Uniquely Beautiful
By Sheela Vijayan
BEAUTY THROUGH THE AGES
Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all? Most little girls would have grown up hearing this and stare into the mirror, trying to be a Disney princess. Fast forward a few years and Disney princesses are now replaced with Barbie and her almost impossible-to-achieve curves. A few more years down the line, and they would want to emulate the pop star or movie actress of their time. Oh yes, there is always a mirror in front of a girl but sadly, most girls do not like what they see in the mirror. Instead, they try to trick the mirror into showing something else, and that something else is whatever that is currently trendy.
DANGERS OF CONFORMING
The problem is just how fickle the mirror on the wall can be. Let’s look at the body image trends over the past three decades. In the ‘90s, the petite and waif look was in with Kate Moss being the ‘it’ girl. In the 2000s, the tanned and buff look of Gisele Bundchen was the name of the game. Fast forward a decade later, and it’s back to curves with J Lo and Nicki Minaj. If we widen this spectrum of time to include seven decades earlier, the trends were even more confusing. Which then leaves us with this question: How does this affect the self-confidence of women everywhere?
Tanned Asian women are bombarded by advertisements that a fairer complexion is more attractive. Our Caucasian counterparts are given the opposite message: that a tanned complexion is a healthy one. One moment, straight and flat-ironed hair is the trend and the next, curls are in. Jasmine from Aladdin has black hair, Ariel from The Little Mermaid is a redhead while Elsa of Frozen is blonde. So, what colour from L’Oréal’s shelves should we go for? Oh, the wheel of beauty keeps going round and round. How do we keep up?
We depend on the constantly changing voice of the masses to tell us that we are beautiful enough and good enough. We are bombarded by deceptively veiled advertisements telling us that our worth is tied to our looks and worse, what our capability.
Thankfully, there is a Voice that assures us otherwise:
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewellery or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”1
Here, God’s words are a powerful anchor for women. He reminds us that our inner beauty is more valuable than our outer beauty. Our inner beauty is able to surpass the test of time and the war against crow lines and wrinkles. With so much pressure on women to age gracefully (or not age at all), these verses are a refreshing contrast. In His wisdom, He asks us to forsake the ideals of the world because chasing them would leave us empty and constantly falling short of their standards. Rather, He encourages us to seek after what is of great value to Him. That doesn’t mean we dress shabbily. Rather, it just takes the pressure off to constantly look like Barbie.
Often, teenage girls fall prey to the lie that they should dress scantily and wear loads of make-up to attract the guys. This may further influence how they behave with boys and leads to issues such as sex before marriage, pre-marital pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Young girls are being told every day that their worth depends on their looks. Is it such a surprise then that they succumb to anorexia and bulimia? The struggle doesn’t end here because these issues, if not dealt with, carry into womanhood and even motherhood. Therein lies the risk of mothers passing on the same mindset to their daughters. The cycle continues.
It is more important than ever for parents to cultivate the right mindset in their young girls – that their value goes beyond and beneath their looks, and that their beauty is not defined by what the masses say. Often, the voices and opinion of the masses are contrary to who God says we are and have the potential to hinder us from living out our full potential. Perhaps, more than ever in these times, we need to speak out the words in 1 Peter over them as a shield against the world’s teachings.
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
Christina Aguilera sings “I am beautiful, no matter what they say. Words can’t bring me down”. It is empowering and shows how words have the potential to impact our self-esteem. In this loud world, may we seek comfort from the words of our heavenly Father who says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made.
It doesn’t matter if we are 5’ or 5’9”, it doesn’t matter if we are a size 6 or a size 12, it doesn’t matter if our hair is black or blonde or red – God has a specific plan when He made us that way. Kate Winslet shared an empowering story on how she faced rejection due to her size before getting the starring role in Titanic. She didn’t fit the mould that men had cast, but she fought back. In her acceptance speech at the BAFTA Award in 2016, she said, “Look at me now!” Yes, what a tragedy it would be for Titanic fans if Kate had chosen to accept the words of men and walked away from her destiny. Diversity and not conformity is what makes life truly colourful.
AND GOD SAID
So today, let’s celebrate how we are made, for we are uniquely, specially, fearfully and wonderfully made. They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. To all girls and women everywhere, who is our beholder today? Perhaps today, we need to stop looking at the mirror and start looking up. And by doing that, we can rest in these words that have been spoken over us from the time we were created: “… and it was very good.”2
1 1 Peter 3:3-4
2 Genesis 1:31
Asian Beacon: Jul – Sep 2017 (Vol 49 #2, p42-43)