Love can come about in unexpected ways when God takes the lead. Jonathan and Sue Lee’s love story is a reminder to remember that the Lord can use any means to fulfill His purposes for our lives — if we let Him.
In June 2012, Sue Lee Chew walked into Hard Rock Cafe to have lunch with strangers.
“My father passed away the year before. We were very close, and he had always encouraged me to put myself out there more,” Sue Lee said. “When I found out that a Christian singles event was going to be held on Father’s Day, I thought it would humour him if I went.”
Rocking Singles had been organised by the young adult pastors of several churches in Petaling Jaya, and after an awkward start, the crowd of 80-100 Christians loosened up to chat over lunch.
Sue Lee, a self-professed homebody, had gone with an open heart, hoping to make new friends and maybe even spark a romantic connection.
“But there were so few men, every table had just one man to a few ladies,” Sue Lee grinned.
A slow and steady love
At her table was an unassuming man, Jonathan Wong, and another lady who was not very interested in making conversation with either of them.
“In the end, it was just Jon and me talking. Afterwards, I felt nothing. He was geeky and at the time, I was attracted to melancholic men (he isn’t one), and I’d always thought I’d end up with someone from an English-speaking background (he’s not). We didn’t even exchange numbers,” she remembered.
Jonathan, on the other hand, found Sue Lee nice and a good conversationalist. He had come with no expectations, having been roped in by his cell leader. “I was just a chauffeur for my cell,” he said with a chuckle.
After looking through her social media profile and seeing no red flags, he messaged her on Facebook and in July, they went on their first date.
There were no butterflies at the start, admits Sue Lee, but as she got to know Jonathan better, they flitted in. Seven months later, Jonathan proposed, and in January 2014, they got hitched.
Today, 11 years and four children later, they support church-led efforts for singles seeking faith-centred relationships and believe such initiatives are necessary.
The Church, they maintain, can act as a filtration system of its own, helping singles find community and possibly a romantic connection. “We view [being part of such events] as choosing not to limit God. He speaks and works in different ways,” Sue Lee shared.
Jonathan added, “Church-driven initiatives provide greater accountability and make us more conscientious about our behaviour, attitudes and intentions towards others.”
Doing whatever it takes to make marriage work
Just because they met via a church event, however, does not guarantee smooth sailing in marriage. The couple acknowledged that their short dating runway, different backgrounds and polar-opposite personalities meant intentional work was needed.
“We both married quite late (Jon was 37, I was 33) and were set in our ways, so adjustment took effort. I’m grateful that as believers, we know marriage is for life. That has been helpful — we do what it takes to make the marriage work,” Sue Lee explained.
The couple have done The Marriage Course by Alpha, and a few years ago, sought Christian couples counselling to sort out recurring issues.
“If this is to improve your marriage, why not? We should use every tool available within our reach to improve our marriage for the long-term and give us a platform to share openly, guided by Christian professionals,” Jonathan said humbly.
The couple hopes to see the Church and Christian community play a more intentional role in helping believers navigate singlehood, marriage and family life through the lens of discipleship. “Strong families make strong churches and strong societies,” Sue Lee opined.
For Jonathan, this starts with being intentional about working with other churches to organise social gatherings — hiking, pickleball, movie nights, camps — so singles have the opportunity to meet other like-minded believers.
“It’s also helpful to have older, spiritually mature couples who are unafraid to introduce or suggest a new friendship,” he added.
Be faithful in every season, whether single or married
As for single believers navigating a season of seeking and waiting, Jonathan and Sue Lee’s encouragement is to first be faithful where you are.
“Singlehood is the best time to build your spiritual life; it is a sanctifying process. Don’t idolise marriage and make it your primary goal. Focus on your main identity as a child of God, stay plugged into church and be faithful at work, with family and in ministry,” Sue Lee advised.
Jonathan also pointedly said that while the journey towards marriage is about discovering a life partner, it is also about being discoverable. As someone with a quieter nature, it took some effort.
“By putting ourselves out there to find new communities, make new friends or attend events like Rocking Singles, we allow God to line up our circumstances. It requires a bit of humility too, to explore other options,” Sue Lee mused. “I’m so thankful to have met Jon.”
Next to her, Jonathan could not help but smile. “Sometimes, we just need a push. It takes a little effort to connect, but the rewards can be lasting.”
