By John Joel
From a young age, I’ve known Jesus but not deeply. As a Klang boy, I would follow my parents to church every week, serve in the media ministry, attend Royal Rangers and even help to organise special events.
Though I looked faithful on the outside, my walk with God had become routine. By the time college began, that lack of depth caught up with me, and the world’s pull grew stronger.
I decided to toe the line between Christ and the world, believing I needed to find a ‘balance’. As the months rolled by, I began to attend church less and spend more time with friends outside.
Alcohol, partying and smoking became part of my life, and for a season, I floated on the highs of the world. Yet, I felt empty inside. I lived in fear of being looked down upon and did not have the confidence to stand up to anyone. This went on for five years.
The one thing that kept me alive through the turbulent years of my youth was the constant prayers of my parents, Velankani and Flora. One day, I attended a special prayer meeting held in my church.
A South African minister prayed for me and prophesied that I was supposed to be standing on the stage, leading the congregation in worship.
That night, I repented before the Lord. I was 24. I committed to attending church regularly, and eventually I joined a youth cell.
The first time I went to a cell group, none of my childhood friends spoke to me except for Bro. Nielsen. If he had not reached out to me that day, I would have returned to my old life. Today, he is my best friend and partner in ministry.
Three months after my return to church, my father went home to be with the Lord. It devastated me. Of his three sons, I had been the closest to him, and during my wayward years, he never gave up on me. His steadfast faith and unwavering prayers became the very example that pushed me to hold on to God even more after his passing.
As my faith grew stronger, I began to lead worship in church and was an upcoming youth leader. However, I had not fully repented. I could not give up smoking and drinking.
On 3 February 2022, God spoke to me through a vision. He told me to completely turn from my old ways and move closer to Him. Deep inside, I felt as though it was my last chance to choose Jesus, a final invitation before I lost myself completely to the world.
Convicted, I cut myself off from nearly everything, except work and church. For six months, I turned down social outings and distanced myself from friends. It was the lowest, hardest point of my life. I often cried out to God, desperate for direction. Each time, His reply was simple:
“Keep getting closer to Me.”
That was all He said. No details, no shortcuts. Just that. I didn’t know how to do it, but my youth leader at the time, Bro. Sarath walked with me step by step.
The hardest part of the journey was seeking forgiveness from those I had wronged. It took me one year to clear my “ledger,” but once I made things right before God, I began to experience His blessing in my life, my work, and my ministry.
I also attended an Alpha course. The conversations there deeply impacted me and strengthened my faith. My relationship with Pr. Abraham, my church’s Head of the Tamil Department, also improved with time. With God’s help, we partnered together to grow the youth ministry.
When I first stepped up to lead our church’s Tamil youth ministry, fewer than 10 youths were attending regularly, even though our church had more than 100 young people.
In 2023, we organised our first youth camp and had 20 sign-ups, and at the time, I thought that was amazing. What began small turned into steady, God-given growth.
After camp, we made it a point to walk with the youths consistently, focusing on authenticity and trust. Slowly but surely, week by week, the numbers began to rise.
At this year’s youth camp, 30 youths and 10 young adults turned up – the highest we’ve had in recent years.
I felt strongly that the focus of our camp had to be this question: “Who is Jesus to you?” Because if my youth truly know who Jesus is, then I have nothing to worry about. Many of today’s youth are slaves to technology, shaped by what they consume on social media.
Leading a youth ministry isn’t easy. There have been seasons when I was the only active leader. The sacrifices are real, but the reward of seeing lives transformed in Christ is greater.
Even though the numbers may still seem small, the youths are dedicated, enthusiastic, and now serving not only in the youth ministry but also in the main service. God has been so gracious in giving us growth, yet I know there’s still much more to be done.
Looking back, the ones who never gave up on me have been the youths themselves. They keep showing up every week, allowing me to lead them and speak into their lives. It has been a humbling, enriching journey to walk with Malaysia’s next generation. We must meet them at their level and be the bridge that connects them to Jesus.
Seeing my youth encourages me every day. I believe they will be the future backbone of the Church, because their faith keeps growing.
To any youth reading this, hold onto Jesus. He will never let you go. The easiest choice you can make in life is to love Jesus, because He has never stopped loving you. Once you know who He really is, you will live in a different atmosphere.
